excerpts from the book

The Sociopath Next Door

The Ruthless Versus the Rest of Us

by Martha Stout, 2005, paperback

 

p2
Maybe you are someone who craves money and power, and though you have no vestige of conscience, you do have a magnificent IQ. You have the driving nature and the intellectual capacity to pursue tremendous wealth and influence, and you are in no way moved by the nagging voice of conscience that prevents other people from doing everything and anything they have to do to succeed. You choose business, politics, the la, banking, or international development, or any of a broad array of other power professions, and you pursue your career with a cold passion that tolerates none of the usual moral or legal encumbrances.

... And all of this you do with the exquisite freedom that results from having no conscience whatsoever.

... You become unimaginably, unassailably, and maybe even globally successful. Why not? With your big brain, and no conscience to rein in your schemes, you can do anything at all.

p4
If you are born at the right time, with some access to family fortune, and you have a special talent for whipping up other people's hatred and sense of deprivation, you can arrange to kill large numbers of unsuspecting people. With enough money, you can accomplish this from far away, and you can sit back safely and watch in satisfaction. In fact, terrorism (done from a distance) is the ideal occupation for a person who is possessed of blood lust and no conscience, because if you do it just right, you may be able to make a whole nation jump. And if that is not power, what is?

p25
Conscience is something that we feel... Conscience exists primarily in the realm of "affect," better known as emotion.

p25
Psychologically speaking, conscience is a sense of obligation ultimately based in an emotional attachment to another living creature (often but not always a human being), or to a group of human beings, or even in some cases to humanity as a whole. Conscience does not exist without an emotional bond to someone or something, and in this way conscience is closely allied with the spectrum of emotions we call "love." This alliance is what gives true conscience its resilience and its astonishing authority over those who have it.

p26
Conscience [is a] sense of obligation based in our emotional attachments to others.

p26
If the first five senses are the physical ones-sight, hearing, touch, smell, taste-and the "sixth sense" is how we refer to our intuition, then conscience can be numbered seventh at best. It developed later in the evolution of our species and is still far from universal.

p59
Why do we continue to allow leaders who are motivated by self-interest, or by their own psychological issues from the past, to fan bitterness and political crisis into armed confrontation and war?

p60
Where the disabling of conscience by authority is concerned, there is something even more effective, something more elemental than objectifying the "others," more cloying and miserable than a sense of helplessness, and evidently more difficult to conquer than fear itself. Very simply, we are programmed to obey authority even against our own consciences.

p60
In 1961 and 1962, in New Haven, Connecticut, Yale University professor Stanley Milgram designed and filmed one of the most astonishing psychological experiments ever conducted.

Yale University professor Stanley Milgram

Of all moral principles, the one that comes closest to being universally accepted is this: one should not inflict suffering on a helpless person who is neither harmful nor threatening to oneself. This principle is the counterforce we shall set in opposition to obedience.

p63
Yale University professor Stanley Milgram

A substantial proportion of people do what they are told to do, irrespective of the content of the act and without limitations of conscience, so long as they perceive that the command comes from a legitimate authority.

p63
[Yale University professor Stanley] Milgram believed that authority could put conscience to sleep mainly because the obedient person makes an "adjustment of thought," which is to see himself as not responsible for his own actions. In his mind, he is no longer a person who must act in a morally accountable way, but the agent of an external authority to whom he attributes all responsibility and all initiative. This "adjustment of thought" makes it much easier for benign leadership to establish order and control, but by the same psychological mechanism, it has countless times rolled out the red carpet for self-serving, malevolent, and sociopathic "authorities."

p63
[Yale University professor Stanley] Milgram believed that authority could put conscience to sleep mainly because the obedient person makes an "adjustment of thought," which is to see himself as not responsible for his own actions. In his mind, he is no longer a person who must act in a morally accountable way, but the agent of an external authority to whom he attributes all responsibility and all initiative. This "adjustment of thought" makes it much easier for benign leadership to establish order and control,

p63
In [a] permutation of his experiment [Yale University professor Stanley] Milgram posed an "ordinary man," rather than a scientist, as the person who ordered the subjects to administer shocks. When an "ordinary man" was in charge, instead of a man in a white lab coat, obedience on the part of the subjects dropped from 62.5 percent to 20 percent.

p63
Military experts now know that to make men kill with any kind of reliability, commands must be given by authorities who are present with the troops.

p67
Psychology can provide the military with techniques to make killers out of nonkillers, and the military is using these procedures.

p67
Because its essence is killing, war is the ultimate contest between conscience and authority. Our seventh sense demands that we not take life, and when authority overrules conscience and a soldier is induced to kill in combat, he is very likely to suffer post-traumatic stress disorder immediately and for the remainder of his life.

p106
Albert Einstein

The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don' t do anything about it.

p107
The most reliable sign, the most universal behavior of unscrupulous people is not directed, as one might imagine, at our fearfulness. It is, perversely, an appeal to our sympathy.

p122
Studies on twins have shown that personality features determined by questionnaires (such as extraversion, neuroticism, authoritarianism, empathy, and so forth) have a heritability of between 35 and 50 percent. In other words, twin studies indicate that most measurable aspects of our personalities are 35 to 50 percent innate.

p123
The Texas Adoption Project reports that [on the Psychopathic Deviant scale] individuals resemble their birth mothers, whom they have never met, significantly more than they do the adoptive parents who raised them. From this research, a heritability estimate of 54 percent can be derived, and interestingly, this "Psychopathic Deviate" figure is consistent with the heritability estimates - 35 to 50 percent - generally found in studies of other, more neutral personality characteristics (extraversion, empathy, and so forth).

p123
A person's tendency to possess certain sociopathic characteristics is partially born in the blood, perhaps as much as 50 percent so... Before they were even born, at the very moment of conception [some individuals] were already somewhat predisposed to become deceitful, reckless, faithless, and remorseless.

p126
Sociopathy is an aberration in the ability to have and to appreciate real (noncalculated) emotional experience, and therefore to connect with other people within real (noncalculated) relationships... Conscience never exists without the ability to love, and sociopathy is ultimately based in lovelessness.

p126
Conscience never exists without the ability to love, and sociopathy is ultimately based in lovelessness.

p126
An obligation of any kind is something one feels toward beings, or toward a group of beings, who matter emotionally. And to a sociopath, we simply do not matter.

p127
Narcissism is a failure not of conscience but of empathy, which is the capacity to perceive emotions in others and so react to them appropriately.

p127
Sociopaths do not care about other people.

p131
As was discovered in the United States in the ultrahygienic orphanages of the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, infants who are not touched at all, for purposes of antiseptic perfection, are prone to die quite literally. Succumbing mysteriously to a condition then referred to as marasmus, a Greek word that means "wasting away" - a disorder now called "nonorganic failure to thrive" - nearly all of the untouched babies in these orphanages perished. In the intervening hundred years, developmental psychologists and pediatricians have learned that it is crucially important to hold, cuddle, talk to, and caress babies, and that the consequences of not doing so at all are heartbreaking.

p136
Sociopathy would appear to be relatively rare in certain East Asian countries, notably Japan and China. Studies conducted in both rural and urban areas of Taiwan have found a remarkably low prevalence of antisocial personality disorder, ranging from 0.03 percent to 0.14 percent, which is not none but is impressively less than the Western world's approximate average of 4 percent, which translates to one in twenty-five people.

p136
The prevalence of sociopathy in the United States seems to be increasing. The 1991 Epidemiologic Catchment Area study, sponsored by the National Institute of Mental Health, reported that in the fifteen years preceding the study, the prevalence of antisocial personality disorder had nearly doubled among the young in America.

p136
Cultural influences play a very important role in the development (or not) of sociopathy in any given population.

p136
Robert Hare writes that he believes "our society is moving in the direction of permitting, reinforcing, and in some instances actually valuing some of the traits listed in the Psychopathy Checklist - traits such a impulsivity, irresponsibility, lack of remorse". In his opinion he is joined by theorists who propose that North American culture, which holds individualism as a central value, tends to foster the development of antisocial behavior, and also to disguise it. In other words, in America, the guiltless manipulation of other people "blends" with social expectations to a much greater degree than it would in China or other more group-centered societies.

p136
Robert Hare

Our society is moving in the direction of permitting, reinforcing, and in some instances actually valuing some of the traits listed in the Psychopathy Checklist - traits such a impulsivity, irresponsibility, lack of remorse.

p137
In contrast with our extreme emphasis on individualism and personal control, certain cultures, many in East Asia, dwell theologically on the interrelatedness of all living things. Interestingly, this value is also the basis of conscience.

p137
A Western family by itself cannot redeem a born sociopath. There are too many other voices in the larger society implying that his approach to the world is correct.

p138
Sociopaths can kill without experiencing anguish; thus, people who have no conscience make excellent, unambivalent warriors. And nearly all societies make war.

... Sociopaths are fearless and superior warriors, snipers, undercover assassins, special operatives, vigilantes, and hand-to-hand specialists, because they experience no horror while killing (or while ordering killing) and no guilt after the deed is done.

... A person who can look another person in the eye and calmly shoot him dead is unusual, and in war, valuable.

p138
Sociopaths can kill without experiencing anguish; thus, people who have no conscience make excellent, unambivalent warriors. And nearly all societies make war.

p139
Sociopaths are fearless and superior warriors, snipers, undercover assassins, special operatives, vigilantes, and hand-to-hand specialists, because they experience no horror while killing (or while ordering killing) and no guilt after the deed is done.

... A person who can look another person in the eye and calmly shoot him dead is unusual, and in war, valuable.

p139
Lt. Col. Dave Grossman writes in his book "On Killing"

Whether called sociopaths, sheepdogs, warriors, or heroes, they are there, they are a distinct minority, and in times of danger a nation needs them desperately.

p157
Yale professor Stanley Mi!gram taught us about obedience: At least six out of ten people will blindly obey to the bitter end an official-looking authority in their midst.

p158
Throughout all of human history and to the present, the call to war has included the flattering claim that one's own forces are about to accomplish a victory that will change the world for the better, a triumph that is morally laudable, justified by its humane outcome, unique in human endeavor, righteous, and worthy of enormous gratitude. Since we began to record the human story, all of our major wars have been framed in this way, on all sides of the conflict, and in all languages the adjective most often applied to the word war is holy. An argument can easily be made that humanity will have peace when nations of people are at last able to see through this masterful flattery.

Just as an individual pumped up on the flattery of a manipulator is likely to behave in foolish ways, exaggerated patriotism that is flattery-fueled is a dangerous thing.

p158
Too often, we mistake fear for respect, and the more fearful we are of someone, the more we view him or her as deserving of our respect.

p159
The politician, small or lofty, who menaces the people with frequent reminders of the possibility of crime, violence, or terrorism, and who then uses their magnified fear to gain allegiance, is more likely to be a successful con artist than a legitimate leader. This too has been true throughout human history.

p181
Mahatma Gandhi

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.

p188
What is meaningful in life to the sociopath is winning and domination.

p211
There is the Goiden Rule, which is humankind's most ancient ethic of reciprocity, and perhaps the most succinct and clearly operationalized moral philosophy ever conceived. Confucius was merely recording an even older Chinese saying when he wrote, "Do not do to others what you would not want done to you," and when Jesus said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," he was referring to an already time-honored Jewish proverb that instructed, "What is hateful to you, do not to your fellow man. This is the law: all the rest is commentary." The Mahabharata tells followers of Hinduism, "This is the sum of the Dharma: Do naught unto others which would cause you pain if done to you." And in indigenous traditions as well-the Yoruba of Nigeria say, "One going to take a pointed stick to pinch a baby bird should first try it on himself to feel how it hurts." And the Lakota religious leader Black Elk taught, "All things are our relatives; what we do to everything, we do to ourselves. All is really One."

p211
Confucius

Do not do to others what you would not want done to you.

p211

Jesus

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

p211
The Mahabharata tells followers of Hinduism

This is the sum of the Dharma: Do naught unto others which would cause you pain if done to you.

p211
the Yoruba of Nigeria say

One going to take a pointed stick to pinch a baby bird should first try it on himself to feel how it hurts.

p211
the Lakota religious leader Black Elk taught

All things are our relatives; what we do to everything, we do to ourselves. All is really One.


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